Pre-Departure Thoughts

Blog Entry #1: Pre-Departure

(Thursday January 2^nd, 2020)

I am sitting in the San Francisco Airport in the international terminal, alone. I just said goodbye to my family and sped through security (I’ve flown many times before, so I like to call myself a pro when it comes to security procedures) to then wander my way through the G terminal to find gate 10. I am three hours early for my flight and I’m not really sure what to do. I see the familiar sight of the black and silver airport chairs (I’m sitting in one right now in fact), escalators galore and lots of signs with arrows pointing every which way. I also see a great diversity of people wandering just like me. I hear all kinds of languages and accents that I can’t even recognize and I’m observing and taking it all in. I smell nothing in particular at the moment, but I can’t say its especially pleasant. I taste my raspberry banana smoothie that I just scarfed down a few minutes ago. But what I’m here to talk about the most are my feelings. My feelings about flying this long by myself, being in an airport I am not familiar with by myself, how to pass the time in a way that doesn’t use up my battery, how I will feel on my 15 hour long flight, what I will do when I get to Sydney and how I will make sure I’m on time to everything. But most of all, I’m here to discuss my feelings about going to a foreign country with different food, culture, weather and possible experiences all while being without my family and having to successfully complete an upper division psychology course. To be honest, I’m scared but still somewhat excited. I’m also nervous though. And I’m tired. But the feeling I would like to focus on right now is the nervousness because, due to my past experiences with severe anxiety, I never ever thought I’d be studying abroad during college. Heck, I never thought I’d be able to handle going away for college in the first place. But as I am more than halfway through college already, I have realized how much I have grown, changed and matured, and I feel extremely confident in my abilities to work through any bouts of anxiety no matter where I am in the world. So, why not explore the world when you have a chance?

Now, you may be wondering how I came about this opportunity to study abroad in Sydney, Australia. How did I find the program, how did the application process work and how I managed to get all the information and paperwork I needed in a timely manner? First, the idea of studying abroad had always crossed my mind and my parents really wanted me to take advantage of the opportunity. They wanted me to study an entire semester abroad but that never seemed appealing to me. Honestly, studying abroad overall didn’t seem fully appealing to me because of how new and different the experience would be, and I feared how I would react to the situation based on my past struggle with anxiety. One day I happened to be walking by the USD International Center in Serra Hall, where a lot of my classes were during the fall 2019 semester, and I saw an advertising board with the options for Intersession 2020 study abroad. If I hadn’t walked past that board and seen the beautiful picture of Australia and the advertised psychology class, that would be useful for my major credit, I’m not sure if I would have even looked anywhere else for study abroad opportunities. What intrigued me about intersession was the length of the program. It felt doable and a good step before the full semester experience which I feared so much. So, I proposed the idea to my parents and noted that the cost was in addition to the chunk of money they are already paying for me to attend USD. I knew there was a possibility that they would say no due to financial reasons, but they surprised me when I came home one weekend and said they were willing to pay for me to go to Australia and I was so happy I nearly cried. Maybe I wanted to go abroad more than I initially thought! Anyways, after my parents agreed, I opened an online application and began filling out questionnaires and uploading documents like a madwoman. The international center was very helpful with reminding me of upcoming due dates and pertinent information. Although, it was hard to wait on them to relay the information because I wanted to know everything as soon as possible so I could mentally and physically plan all I needed but I survived! Now it’s up to me to make it comfortably through this flight and embark on a journey of a lifetime. Of course, I’m still anxious about so many things because so much is still unknown, but I am confident I will flourish!